Archive / chronic pain

RSS feed for this section

Self Development Tips

Self Development Tips

#Self Development Tips

www.jobjasoos.com
It’s easy to break through when you know how!

Is a problem still a problem, if you don’t know you have it?

Absolutely!  Ignorance is not bliss!  Ignorance can get you killed, maimed, broke, divorced, out of work, out of luck, and out of chances!

The smart thing is to get over being ignorant of any problems you don’t even know you might have, and get some self development tips.

How do I know I have a problem?

How’s life?  Any areas you want to work better?  There you go, found some straight away!  Wasn’t hard at all.  Now, how to go about making them better.  This is where those self development tips come in!

“You Have the Power to Fulfill Your Dreams!”Tae Yun Kim

Why self development tips?

#Self Development Tips

petetheplumberny.com Call in the experts!

Why not just hire someone to fix the problem?  That would be good if it was a plumbing problem, where you can call in someone trained in fixing plumbing problems.  However, if the issue is closer to home, such as within YOU, then who better to look to for answers than the person who lives there with the issues?

It’s not hard to work out what the problems are, but it can be tricky working out the answers, and often, we don’t know them.  If we did, we’d probably try to or already have the problem solved with the answers.  However, the real problem is that most people don’t know how to ask for what they want!  And the super major problem with that is that they don’t realise they don’t know how to ask for what they want!

Self development tips 1:  How to ask for what you want!

This is a big issue, so we’ll devote a little time to it.  The formula here applies to everything in life, so it’s worth taking notes.  There are 5 steps in Self Development tips 1:

Step 1:  Know what you want!  Sounds simple, but how many times have you been asked, and been unable to immediately answer?  Before you start asking for anything, be really clear on what it is you want, or want help with.  Clarity leads to power, so get clarity first.  That may mean writing it out, mind mapping it or talking it over with a friend who can play devil’s advocate, but get clear on exactly what you want!

#Self Development Tips

ahboycreativemind.blogspot.com
Clarity leads to power!

Step 2:  Know who to ask!  Again, sounds simple, but why do so many people get it wrong?  Sure, the taxi driver may have a sound opinion on it, and may even be right, but is he the guy to ask?  Is your brother-in-law the guy to ask?  Possibly not.

How do you know who to ask?  Look at their results.  Look at what their profession is.  If it’s relevant to your question, see if they are getting results in it.  Look around for people who already have the answers to the question you want answered.  But before you ask, make sure you are asking someone who actually can help you!

That’s not to say that family and friends are not the right people to ask, nor should you shun the taxi driver.  Get a range of opinions and rationally sift through them, educate yourself so that you are qualified to analyse the answers and make your decisions and choices.

Step 3:  Be in exchange!  You want a pizza?  $10.00 please!  You want the answer to a life changing question or problem?  What is it worth to you?  What will someone charge you to provide it?  There needs to be an exchange of some sort.

#Self Development Tips

surangi.blogspot.com
Talk to the right people

If it was simply information, you might Google it for free.  But experience?  That comes from a mentor, someone who has been there.  That will cost a little more.  You need to be clear in advance what it is worth to you to get what you want, what you are asking for, and whether you can afford to pay for it!

A small distinction:  the exchange need not be money!  If the retired business person over the road had the answers to your business problems, they may not want money in exchange.  They may want you to talk to them, invite them into your business for their interests’ sake, give them something to think about and do.  They may be missing the activity of their business life and want an interest again, something to do….  Some mentors want a percentage share of profits; some want an hourly consulting rate.  Or they may just need the lawn mowing from time to time…!  An exchange – something that feels fair to both of you.

Step 4:  Ask as if it’s yours.  Be confident, bold, assertive.  Ask as though you already have it!

#Self Development Tips

asoterralingua.blogspot.com
CONFIDENCE!

The timid people stay home and wonder, while the successful people get out and ask, do, and get what they need from life.  That doesn’t mean you have to be aggressive.  It does mean you must have the courage and confidence to take that step forward and actually ask someone to help you.  In asking for help, the implication is also that you are humble enough to acknowledge that you need help and are also humble enough to accept it!  This is not about being rude, arrogant and pushy in your quest for what you want.  It’s about turning up, and allowing yourself the opportunity to be in the right place at the right time, to get what you need.  Rarely will it be home delivered, you will have to get off the couch to get it!

Step 5:  Ask until it is yours!  Sometimes, you ask the question and get your answer immediately.  It’s possible!  Right place, right time.  But that’s not all the time, and you might have to ask a lot of questions in a lot of different ways, to get your answers and get what you went looking for.

Some people won’t have your answer.  Some people will, but won’t give it to you, or you won’t be able to afford it.  Some people will feel threatened by you and others will be wary about you asking them trade secrets.  But then, eventually you will come across the person with the answers you need.  Eventually, you will find what you want.  But you still need to keep knocking on doors until that time comes and it may not come easily.

This was the first of your self development tips.  Apply it everywhere because it works on anything you need.  Anything.  Including the rest of the tips – it’s a bit like the padlock on the pantry door – once you get that one right, the rest is a lot easier!

Self development tips 2: Daring to dream.

#Self Development Tips

techandscience.com
It’s all in the way you see yourself!

It might seem silly to include this, but so many people have heard “NO” so often, they longer allow themselves to dare to want anything, or dream of anything better.  It’s called conditioning.  We all need to dare to dream of what could be, so that we can go looking for it!

Is a better relationship with your partner possible?  Possibly.  But you need to dare dream of it being better first, and then talking about it with them to ignite their dreams too!

Is a more satisfying career possible?  Possibly, but first, allow yourself to get clear on what would make it better and more satisfying.  Could the same position be made better with a few changes and tweaks, or do you need to start again somewhere else?

Clarity leads to power.  Allow yourself to dream.  Get clear on your dreams.  Then go looking for them, to make them happen.

 

Self development tips 3:  Have a plan.

Again, a simple but very profound point.  When you take a holiday, how much time do you put into preparation for it?  For a fortnight of holidaying, you probably put months of evenings planning into it.  But how long since you did some life planning, which includes your work life, family life AND your holidays?  So few people plan ahead for anything but events, when the whole of your life is a journey!

#Self Development Tips

easyconsult.com.au
Have a plan!

When you look at holiday planning, put it into Google, and it will come up with something like 370 MILLION results in 0.2 seconds.  You can get phone apps for holiday planning.  Holiday planning has been systemized so much that you can hardly get it wrong anymore!  You just plug into the system and your holiday is done for you.

Why not systemize your life planning?

In just the same way, you can plug into personal and self development planning which encompasses relationships, career, finances, spiritual development, dreams and goals, everything you could possibly want in life, as well as holidays, and for a few minutes a day, have it organised as well!  There is a blog worth checking on this point – see it HERE, and make Self Development Tips 3 the one which changed your life!

Think about it.  You asked the question – self development tips 1, you dared to dream – self development tips 2 and made a plan – self development tips 3 – you happened to be in the right place at the right time, this time!  Sounds like a program you’d want to be in!  Start it here now!

Self development tips – there just might be something in it!

Next time, let’s look at feeling good about being you, who you are, and what you stand for.  Let’s look at self esteem and being proud of you!

If you enjoyed this post, if you believe it has merit, please share and reblog it, send it on to your friends, and anyone else you think may benefit.  Who knows whose life you might change!  Including yours!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails!

Ray Jamieson

“Don’t try to fix me, I’m not broken…”Evanescence

Challenges of Chronic Illness

Living with the challenges of Chronic Illness

“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” James A. Baldwin

If you are living with the challenges of Chronic Illness, you already know that you face challenges that most other people take for granted.  You are living with challenges that other people wouldn’t or couldn’t put up with – until one day they may be struck down with it too!  And that’s the kicker – so many people don’t realise what you are going through, and for many of those that do, you sometimes wish they didn’t!

#Challenges of Chronic Illness

Chronic Illness symptoms,
Courtesy of http://menalive.com

Do you miss the life you had before it was changed by your condition?  Most people do.  Although there are those who proclaim that their illness was “the best thing that ever happened” because of the changes it forced in their lives.  And that may be so.  However, that’s hard to understand unless you are living in the situation.

How many times before your diagnosis did a doctor or even a friend or family member tell you “It’s all in your mind!”  Or “Just get over it!”  You’d love to, but there really is a problem, it’s just that they can’t see it!

However, when life does change dramatically, and you can’t do what you used to do, there’s a level of acceptance necessary to move forward.  Even if only for a time, even if in a few months or a year or two you can regain your old life, you still have to live in the present, and that’s where your present condition might be, to live with the challenges of chronic illness or chronic pain.  Acceptance can be a challenge, when you know what you are missing out on.

Another of the major #challenges of chronic illness you may have is the guilt you feel, at not being able to handle everything like you once did – relying on other people might not sit well with you.  If you were the sort of person who was very capable and everyone relied on you to keep their worlds working, and now they can’t, quite often they inadvertently transfer their disappointment to you and it registers with you as guilt.

#Challenges of Chronic Illness

Courtesy of www.wikihow.com
Feelings of guilt

Guilt can gnaw away at you, and combined with the feelings of inadequacy of the situation anyway, it’s hard to handle.

But that’s not all; there’s more to this yet!

Another of the challenges of chronic illness is that it often tears away your financial independence!  You might end up on some sort of disability pension or less, because going out to work is just not possible!  Even the best intentioned employer needs to know that you can at least turn up for work, and sometimes, you won’t, because you just can’t!  You may have to find a new way to create some extra income for yourself, without going to work!

#Challenges of Chronic Illness

Medical expenses
courtesy of understandinggov.org

A fact of life with the challenges of chronic illness is that no matter what your plans are, there will be days when you wake up and realise, almost as soon as you open your eyes, that all your plans for the day are out the window – you aren’t going anywhere!  It makes goalsetting, a working life or career, study and many other things, seriously difficult to plan ahead with!  You need a new way of looking at goalsetting, at life, and living and just getting by.

Your relationships also take a battering until they either evolve into your new situation, or they don’t.  It can be a serious challenge for a spouse or best friend to have you transform from an energetic and vital personality, to someone who perhaps needs a carer, and perhaps that carer has to be them!

The person and/or friends who loved you as that independent person before now have to change the way they relate to you.  They have to learn that when you are upset, grumpy, frustrated with life and the world in general, even if you are snapping at them, it’s not them you are angry with!  It’s your new situation you are angry with, and they are simply within the blast range while you are upset with the world!

Friendships will be tested by the challenges of chronic illness and those strong enough to survive this transition period will be incredible relationships.  Those that did not survive would have failed the next friendship test anyway – something that wasn’t related to you would have caused the relationship to break down, independent of you.  It’s not something to feel guilty over; it’s something to feel good about, in a crazy way – your real friends, the people who truly care about you are still here!  The fair weather friends will not be!

How do you manage living and life as a person with the challenges of Chronic Illness?

If this is you, there is a way forward, but you may need to take another look at the way you manage your life.  Structurally, practically you may have a routine sorted out, where you get through each day without too much drama.  However, is it really living?

#Challenges of Chronic Illness

The way forward! Courtesy of www.surfcoasttimes.com.au

If there was a better way, that took just a few minutes a day, morning and evening, would you consider it?  Because that’s what it takes.

It’s about the way you prepare your day and days for what is ahead of you.  It’s about allowing yourself and even setting yourself up to have little wins, and then celebrating them.  It’s about finding things to be grateful for, no matter how small.  It’s about setting goals that build into a life you desire, brick by brick, small, manageable goals, flexible enough for you to manage, numerous enough to build your dreams with.

It’s about creating a framework, a supportive environment around you and within you, independent of any illness or pain you suffer, where you create a team of people to build your life with.  It’s about becoming totally aware of everything in your life, and using your awareness to create something new.  It’s about creating habits that automatically help you choose the success path, in whatever you do.

If you think this is too much, too crazy, too far from what you believe is possible, then perhaps that is true for you, now.  That doesn’t make it the truth though……

If, on the other hand, you have had enough of banging your head against a wall for so long that the bricks are soft, then perhaps it’s time to look at another way to live.  Start building that new environment around you, and start looking at life differently.  Stop letting the challenges of chronic illness dictate how your life runs; take a look from a different perspective.

No, it might not stop the pain.  It might not cure the illness.  It might just make it less important in your life; it might take it from centre stage to just being an annoyance that creeps in from time to time…  And it might just give you a life again!

Life Change 90 – take a look.  In the next 90 days, your life can change!  Make that the next of your challenges of chronic illness – change your life into what you want in the next 90 days!

We can throw stones, complain about them, stumble on them, climb over them, or build with them.” William Arthur Ward

If you are a person suffering the challenges of chronic illness, or know someone who is, please share this with them, or reblog it, so that others can learn from it.  Chronic Illness is a challenge within my own family and we understand this issue at a very personal level.

We would love to think that others could benefit from our experiences and perhaps gain some support from what we do and what we have learnt over the last decade.

Til next time, fair winds and full sails,

Ray Jamieson

 

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox

Join other followers: